Why Open Adoption?

Hello friends and family on this cold March day.  I'm writing today to update everyone on what's been going on and also to explain why Paul and I are choosing an open adoption.

We haven't had any news on the adoption front.  We continue to raise money through generous gifts and proceeds of my jewelry sales.  We have raised all the money for '2nd Home Study' which we hope we won't be in the book long enough to need this, but we are thankful the money is there.  So we now focus on the lawyer cost and after that the Post-Placement cost.  So only two more financial hurdles to get over.  Though we don't like the constant waiting for baby we feel so blessed that money has not been an issue in this adoption process.

Now for the second topic: Open Adoption.  I wanted to talk to you about open adoption because most people either don't know what an open adoption is or they reject the idea.  Now I would like to preface this by saying that open adoption may not be for everyone, but it is the route Paul and I have chosen for our future family.

An open adoption comes in many forms, depending on both families.   Paul and I hope to share pictures, phone calls, and visits with the birth family.  We want them to be an important part in our child's life.  

A closed adoption is a little bit different.  In a closed adoption you only get a piece of paper with names and not a lot of information.  A closed adoption feels like a safer bet to some, but what about the child?  Is it really the best thing for them?  Adoption isn't about us, it's about the child.

I recently watched a very good documentary called 'Closure' on Netflix.  It was about a woman finding her biological family.  I highly recommend it to help those looking to understand adoption on all sides.

I believe the biggest hang-up with open adoption comes down to the nature vs. nurture debate. Parents want to raise their children and love them hope that they can nurture them in the best way possible.  But lets be honest genetics play a big part in the life and development of the child.  Just because the child wants to know why they have curly hair or why they are so good at sports doesn't mean they denounce you as adoptive parents.  Everyone wants to a deep connection with other people and there isn't anything deeper than blood.

Paul and I realize that our child will have us as mom and dad, but also have a birth-mom and birth-dad and a whole bunch of other "birth-relatives" in their life and that's beautiful.  Because in the long and short of it who doesn't like having more people in their corner?

Another milestone reached!

Hello family and friends!

We have reached our next goal and raised the $7,500 that goes toward our placement costs.  This is the largest amount that we had to raise so Paul and I feel a great burden lifted from our shoulders.

The next financial goal will be to raise $2,500 for our second home study.  We already received paperwork to update our physicals and the wonderful finger printing.  We can only guess that we will have to have our 2nd visit from our social worker later on in the year.

A big thank you to all those who helped us reach this goal! And we appreciate your continued support and prayers.

The Paters

Nursery pictures

Hello everyone!

We decided to post some nursery pictures since it is officially decorated.  No news on the adoption process.  Still in the book and still waiting.  We just reached $4000 of the $7500 we need for the placement cost and I will be having another fundraiser soon with ApParent Project again.

Sneak peek of what I will be selling (picture from the ApParent projects facebook page)

And now for the nursery pictures!

Thanks for the support and keep us in your prayers!

The Paters

Pater paper pregnancy is a go!

We are officially in the profile book!

That's right, we are in the profile book and now we wait...  No seriously that's all we do till a birth mother picks us.  So we wait and continue to raise money.  We are currently raising money toward the placement cost of $7500.  As of now, we are $4500 away from having that paid for.  

The placement cost is kind of like a hospital bill.  We get to pick up baby and a couple weeks later we are issued the placement cost bill. It's truly a guessing game as to when we will be picked so we have hopes of having that bill covered and then some by the time the baby gets here.

Now when we are picked by a birth mother we will not be able to share that information through our blog or facebook.  Instead you can give us your personal e-mail and we will share what information we can that way.  So when we are picked we will probably post things that will drive you all crazy because we know something and you don't.  :)

A huge thanks to those who continue to help us.  We have a thirty-one fundraiser going on now through the 29th (closes at noon).  100% of the commission goes toward our adoption fund.  You can purchase items through Anne Little's site. Here is the link to Anne's Thirty-One page, click on "My Parties" and "Shop Now" to help raise money and buy yourself something pretty!

https://www.mythirtyone.com/AnneLittle/

Paper pregnancy is a go!

Thirty-One Fundraiser for baby Pater

Funding raising for our adoption continues..

Anne Little has graciously decided to helped us with this Thirty-One Fundraiser Party, which will help Paul and I reach our goal for adoption costs.

Party starts now and goes till January 29th, closes at noon!
Here is the link to Anne's Thirty-One page, clink on "My Parties" and "Shop Now" to help raise money and buy yourself something pretty!
Our goal is to raise $1200. If you can't help buy something, consider helping by hosting a party for us. You can contact Anne through her blog.

https://www.mythirtyone.com/AnneLittle/

Here is the PDF file so you can see the Thirty-One catalog
http://assets.thirtyonetoday.com.s3.amazonaws.com/products/Catalogs/spring2014/Catalog.pdf

Monthly Customer Special: The customer special is spend $35 and get one of the small space organizational products for half price!
http://assets.thirtyonetoday.com.s3.amazonaws.com/monthy-specials/2014/jan/MS_14.01_Flier_US_web.pdf

***HOW TO ENTER A SPECIAL: Enter at least $35 in products at regular price. Then enter the item number of the item you would like at 50% followed by the letter “S”. It will show up in your cart at the special price.
http://morekids4me.blogspot.com/p/thirty-one-adoption-fundraisers.html

Buy something, tell a friend, tell everyone you know. Paul and I are only $4000 away from having all the Placement costs. Since we stared in April we have raised $12,800. We still have more costs after the placement, but when it comes to adoption, it's one goal at a time.

Thanks to all of you who have supported us!  We could not do it without you!

Profile News!

It's been awhile since we have posted a new blog but fret not things are still happening.  We officially turned in our profile pages today to Lutheran Social Services.  They are going to be distributed accordingly throughout Lutheran Social Services and we will be in the book as of January 1st.  It is fitting that we start the new year with this new adventure.

Some fundraising news.  Paul and I, plus my mom Sheliah, sold bracelets to help raise money.  It was through the ApParent Project, which I highly recommend you looking up.
http://www.apparentproject.org/

The ApParent Project is a non-profit organization that is run in Haiti.  They work with local artisans to create jewelry, pottery and metal crafts.  The profits of sales help the local people earn a living so they can support their families.

We thank everyone for purchasing them.  The bracelets sold for $8 a piece, $4 of which went to our adoption fund and $4 of which went to the ApParent Project to help the local artisans.  We sold 300 bracelets which earned our adoption fund $1200 and ApParent project $1200!  We encourage you to look at some of there goods.  They would make lovely Christmas gifts and help artisans support themselves and families.
http://www.markethaiti.com/

As we wait to be put in the book and then wait some more to be chosen by a birth mother we continue raising money.  The next financial goal for the placement fees is $7500.  We currently have $2000 saved.  Onward and upwards!

We ask and thank you for your continued prayers!
The Paters

Milestone!

We are one step closer to being in the book!  That's right folks, we have raised the needed $4000 for pre-placement services, now just to have the meeting.  That is scheduled at the end of October, so if everything continues to go smoothly, we will be in the book by November (or at least by the end of the year).

We continue to ask for your prayers and help as we continue our journey.  The next financial milestone will be the placement services and it's total is $7500.  Which is scary, but we've come so far and we only started in April.